top of page

Not A Subscriber?

Join 20,000+ to get the new Rugged Human Letter each Saturday morning. (You'll learn a lot about life, business and human potential)

The Motivation Myth: Why It Doesn't Work (And What Does)


The Myth of Motivation: Why It's Not Enough


Motivation is a tease.


It promises inspiration but rarely delivers lasting results. It's like finding that half-eaten bag of chips under your car seat—you eat it because you're starving, not because it's a gourmet meal.


cartoon man chasing a carrot on a stick signifying chasing motivation

It's a temporary jolt, the gas station you keep visiting because your life's fuel gauge is permanently stuck on 'E.'


We've bought into the myth of motivation, believing it's the key to unlocking our 'potential.'


But here's the disappointing truth: motivation isn't coming to save you. Waiting to feel motivated is a recipe for wasted time.

“Motivation gets you started, habit keeps you going.”- Jim Rohn

Motivation is the initial push, the first step.


But habits are what get you to the finish line.


It’s the systems and routines you build – the stuff you do even when you don’t feel like it – that determine your success, not those fleeting moments of “I can conquer the world!” energy.


Understanding the Two Faces of Motivation: Intrinsic vs. Extrinsic

Here’s the deal: motivation comes in two flavors: intrinsic and extrinsic. Intrinsic motivation is that burning desire from within. You do something because you genuinely love it, because it makes you feel alive.


a simple flame and carrot signifying internal and external motivation

Extrinsic motivation, on the other hand, is the dangling carrot. Rewards like money, fame (good luck with that), or even the desperate need for your mom’s approval.

“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.”  Albert Schweitzer

What is Intrinsic Motivation? (The Internal Drive)

Deci and Ryan’s famous research on self-determination theory dives deep into intrinsic motivation. They found that it’s the real game-changer for long-term behavior.


Internal desires drive it – you do it because it’s inherently satisfying. Their work shows that fostering intrinsic motivation is crucial for sticking with something.


They found that intrinsic motivation thrives when three basic human needs are met:


  1. Autonomy (feeling in control)

  2. Competence (feeling capable)

  3. Relatedness (feeling connected)


When these needs are satisfied, you’re way more likely to do things because you actually enjoy them.


What is Extrinsic Motivation? (The External Rewards)

External rewards drive extrinsic motivation. Extrinsic motivation centers around our outside world and the consequences of our actions—things like money, praise, grades, fame, or the threat of punishment.


But there is a grain of salt.


The Overjustification Effect: When Rewards Backfire

External rewards can actually kill intrinsic motivation.


When you start rewarding people for things they already love doing, they start seeing their motivation as external. This makes them enjoy it less.


flame being extinguished by trophies signifying when rewards backfire

It’s like paying your kid to play video games – they might start seeing it as a chore, not fun.


The problem with relying on extrinsic motivation is that it’s like a sugar rush – it fades fast. That new job title or pay raise will lose its shine.


Then you’re back to square one, chasing the next hit of external validation. In the workplace, someone intrinsically motivated is driven by the work itself. They like solving problems. Someone extrinsically motivated wants the bonuses and promotions.


Why Motivation Alone Falls Short: The Power of Habits

Motivation is fleeting. It comes and goes like the wind. One day you're fired up and ready to conquer the world, the next you can barely drag yourself off the couch.


arrows showing motivation vs habits

This inconsistency is why relying only on motivation is a recipe for failure. It's habits that provide the consistent foundation for achieving our goals.


Motivation vs. Habits: A Crucial Distinction

Motivation and habits are often confused, but they are fundamentally different. Motivation is a feeling—a desire or drive to do something. It's an emotional state that various factors can influence, but it's inherently unstable.


Habits, on the other hand, are actions—automatic behaviors that we perform without much conscious thought. They are ingrained patterns of behavior that become easier and easier to repeat over time.


Michael Jordan: Turning Failure into Fuel 

Arguably the greatest basketball player ever, Michael Jordan got cut from his high school team.


Let that sink in.


This colossal failure became the catalyst for his legendary career. Jordan didn’t just whine about it. He used it. He turned that rejection into an unstoppable force.

“I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life, and that is why I succeed.” -Michael Jordan

His early failure lit a fire under his ass. It forced him to practice harder, smarter, and more intensely than anyone else.


His journey wasn’t all highlight reels and easy wins. It was built on relentless hard work. After getting cut, he doubled down. He honed his skills with a maniacal focus. By the time he hit the NBA, he was a force of nature.


It’s about accepting that failure is part of the process. Jordan’s guiding principles were his meta-habits—intense practice, laser focus, and refusal to give up. He adapted to challenges, celebrated small victories (because they matter), and kept pushing forward with grit. His story is a masterclass in turning obstacles into opportunities.


Building Meta-Habits: The Foundation of Long-Term Success


image of gold text with meta habits doing achieving more doing less

Building Effective Habits: Practical Strategies

So, you've got some good habits going. That's a solid start. But if you want to truly level up and dominate your own life (in a good way, of course), you need to think bigger.


You need to think META. (and I'm not talking about Facebook)


Here're how you can create your own brand of motivation and build habits that’ll keep you going even when you want to quit.


What are Meta-Habits? (The Big Picture)

Meta-habits are the overarching habits that define who you are. They're the core principles that guide your actions and shape your identity.


They're not about brushing your teeth or making your bed (though those are good too); they're about the big stuff—the values you live by, the direction you're heading in. Think of them as the operating system for your life.


How Meta-Habits Drive Micro-Habits

Meta-habits are the keystone holding everything together. Once a meta-habit is ingrained, related behaviors become almost automatic.


For example, if 'continuous learning' is your meta-habit, you'll naturally be more inclined to pick up a book, take an online course, or attend a workshop. The meta-habit sets the direction; the micro-habits are the steps you take to get there.

“The chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken"-Samuel Johnson

Integrating Autotelic Activities and Flow:

A key element of building effective meta-habits is incorporating autotelic activities.


Autotelic activities are those you do for their own sake. The word comes from the Greek 'auto' (self) and 'telos' (end or purpose), meaning the activity itself is the reward. You do them because you genuinely enjoy them, not because you're chasing some external outcome. 


Think of it like this: playing a game you love is autotelic; working a job you hate just for the paycheck is not. This ties into Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's research on flow—that state of complete absorption where challenge and skill are perfectly balanced.


arrow upward with word flow

When a task is slightly challenging but still within your capabilities, it creates focus, growth, and a sense of deep satisfaction. Flow increases creativity and well-being. When your habits become autotelic, they’re no longer chores; they become fulfilling parts of your life.


Seligman and Csikszentmihalyi’s research shows that activities aligned with your core values are the ones most likely to create flow.


Maintaining Momentum: Strategies for Staying on Track

Connect with Your "Why" (The Real Reason)

Move past the surface-level crap about wanting six-pack abs.


Why really do you want this? Is it about feeling better, having more energy, proving something to yourself?


man thinking about his purpose

Find the real, gut-level reason, the thing that actually makes you tick. Because when things get tough (and they will), that "why" is what will drag you through the mud.

“He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.”-Nietzsche

Visualize Success (But Don’t Get Lost in Fantasy)

Don't just daydream about the end result. Picture the process.


The daily grind, the small victories, the overcoming of obstacles. This isn't some "manifestation" nonsense; it's about preparing your brain for the actual work. It's like rehearsing a speech—you're getting ready for the real thing.


Habits Over Motivation (Because Motivation can Lie)

When motivation inevitably crashes (and it will), habits are your safety net.


Develop routines that support your goals. Habits make things automatic, so you don’t have to rely on willpower (which is a limited resource, by the way).


Think of habits as your reliable, no-BS friend who always shows up, while motivation is that flaky friend who only calls when they need something.

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”-Aristotle

Charles Duhigg’s work on habits explains how they provide a foundation when motivation is in the toilet. Habits create cravings in your brain. Once you anticipate a reward, the habit loop—cue, routine, reward—becomes automatic. Understanding this loop is crucial for breaking bad habits and building good ones.


power of habit charles duhigg book cover

Habit stacking, popularized by James Clear, is a simple but effective strategy: attach a new habit to an existing one. For example, “After I brush my teeth, I will floss.”


Find Joy in the Process (Even When It Sucks)

Keep the end goal in mind, but don't get hung up on it. Start finding joy in the little things—every step forward is a win.


Life's too short to wait for some big, magical moment. Let's be real, sometimes it's going to suck. But you can still find satisfaction in putting in the work, knowing it's all part of the journey to something bigger.


Building Meta-Habits for Long-Term Domination (of Your Own Life)

Meta-habits are the big-picture habits that define your life. They align with your core values. They make every action feel meaningful.


What are meta-habits exactly? They’re the overarching behaviors that shape your identity. They’re the habits that dictate your path. Focusing on meta-habits creates a roadmap for long-term success and fulfillment.


Meta-habits set off a chain reaction of smaller habits (micro-habits). They support your big goals. Think of meta-habits as the keystone holding everything together. Once a meta-habit is ingrained, related behaviors become almost automatic.

"The chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken.”-Samuel Johnson

For example, the meta-habit of healthy living can lead to micro-habits like meal prepping, regular exercise, and sufficient sleep, which reinforce the overall goal. Autotelic activities—those done for their own sake (from the Greek 'auto' (self) and 'telos' (purpose))—are inherently rewarding.


You do them because you love them, not for an external outcome.


Csikszentmihalyi and Seligman's research indicates that when habits become autotelic (intrinsically rewarding) and aligned with personal values, they are more likely to induce 'flow'—a state of complete absorption that enhances creativity and satisfaction. Steven Kotler's work expands on this, exploring how flow states drive peak performance.


Examples of Meta-Habits and the Micro Habits they influence


  • Health & Fitness: Consistent exercise, healthy eating, sufficient sleep, mindfulness.

  • Learning & Growth: Continuous learning, reading, skill acquisition, mentorship.

  • Creativity & Expression: Writing, creative pursuits (e.g., painting, music), creative problem-solving.

  • Connection & Community: Volunteering/giving back, social engagement, nurturing relationships, practicing empathy.

  • Financial Responsibility: Budgeting, saving, investing, mindful spending.

  • Mindfulness: Meditation, journaling, time in nature, gratitude practice.


Keep the Motivation Fire Burning (Without Burning Yourself Out)

Set Mini-Goals

Big goals can feel overwhelming. Break them down into smaller, more manageable mini-goals. These mini-goals provide a constant stream of small wins, which keeps you going. Each mini-goal is a step closer to the big picture.

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.”- Lao Tzu

Reward Yourself (But Don’t Be an Idiot About It)

While achieving goals is rewarding in itself, it’s important to acknowledge your progress. But make your rewards meaningful. A moment of gratitude, a quick meditation, or enjoying a sunset can be more rewarding than another material possession.


Surround Yourself with the Right People

There’s power in collective motivation. Surround yourself with people who share your journey. Their energy can lift you up. Avoid the energy vampires who drain your motivation.

“Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher.” - Oprah

Choose your tribe wisely.


Regularly Check-In with Yourself (Because Things Change)

Life isn't static. Things change, priorities shift, and unexpected events happen. Periodically assess your progress. Are your habits still working?


If not, adjust them. Motivation is dynamic. It’s okay to change course as you grow. Regular self-assessment keeps you aligned with your values.


Embrace the Ups and Downs

Understand that motivation will fluctuate. That’s normal. The key is to keep moving, even if it’s just a tiny step. Consistency, not perfection, is the goal. Accepting the ups and downs prevents burnout.


Become the Driver of Your Motivation

Motivation isn’t something you chase. You cultivate it.


You find the spark in the process, the act itself, or something bigger than yourself. You build systems and habits to support your goals, especially when motivation is MIA. Willpower is limited. Relying on it is a recipe for disaster.


Habits conserve willpower. They make it easier to stick to your goals.


Every day you’re motivated brings you closer to who you want to be. Self-improvement is a marathon, not a sprint. It takes patience, persistence, and adaptability.


Motivation is a mindset, not a destination. It’s a dance between goals, habits, and inner drive. Keep fueling that fire.


You’ll achieve more than you thought possible. Start small. Focus on one habit. Celebrate your wins. You can create the life you want.


Until next time,


Jerod


Comments


Jerod8_8_24-69-Edit_edited.jpg

Who is Jerod Foos?

I am an entrepreneur and motivation expert. I talk about human performance and personal growth. I am obsessed with building positivity, human potential, and lifestyle design.

When You're Ready, Here's How I Can Help You:

Life Track Method

Habits are blocks of success. If you want help simplifying your big picture - order the Life Track Method.

Prosperity Path.png

Prosperity Path

Reinvent yourself and create your ideal future. Turn what you love into what you do.

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • LinkedIn
  • Instagram
  • TikTok

Follow

Rugged Human Icon person reaching for sky

Personal Growth. Re-Defined.

  • Instagram
  • Facebook
  • X
  • LinkedIn
  • Youtube
  • TikTok

Unique. Perspective. Life. Potential. 

Join the Rugged Human Newsletter. Weekly deep dives into human potential, lifestyle design, and getting more out of life.

bottom of page